Kindly words 

“The kindly word, the cheerful greeting, the sympathetic look, trivial though they may seem, help to brighten the paths of the poor sufferers and are often as ‘oil and wine’ to the bruised spirits entrusted to our care.”—William Osler 

This is my favorite quotation from William Osler. Each one of us has their spirit bruised occasionally—this morning I woke with my spirits black and blue. Every one of us suffers sometimes, and for this Osler’s words are so important—perhaps now more than ever as we try to cope during terribly troubling times around the world. 

I’m not healthcare professional; however, this story shows how all of us can help another person with “the kindly word, the cheerful greeting, the sympathetic look.” Through these, we are all healers sometimes.  

Finishing my coffee the other day in the main square of my small village, Soller, in the mountains of Mallorca, I went inside to pay. Sitting at a small table was an old man, whose name I don’t know, but who I see regularly walking in the village. He must be around 80, blind in one eye, always wears the same newsboy cap, and walks upright with a walking stick. When we meet in the street, he always says the same thing after our “Good morning, how are you?” and that is, “Hope it lasts!” 

This morning was different, however. He was alone at the table, drinking a coffee. When he saw me, he asked me in Catalan, “What advice did your father give you?”

I was surprised because I don’t think he knew my father. “What a nice question,” I said. “He always told me to ‘never stop fighting.’” 

I left and realized that I hadn’t translated my father’s English words into Spanish completely correctly. Luckily, I ran into the old man at the tram station, and said, “Actually, what father always told me was ‘never give up.’”  

The man’s face changed completely, and his whole countenance, body posture, and one eye lit up. “I like that,” he said as he repeated the words “never give up.” “That’s good advice.” 

“There’s always hope, “I responded, “There’s always hope somewhere.” 

The old man leaned on my shoulder as he clambered onto the tram, and said, “Thank you.”  

I truly felt as though I had helped with a few kind words, and as normally happens, helping someone helps you. I walked back with more jaunt in my stride and the old man waved from the tram and even took his cap off in recognition of what those few words had meant to him.  

So, my advice is however you’re feeling, whatever has happened to you during the day or the day before, when approaching and interacting another human being, try: 

1 Giving a sympathetic look—open yourself to the other person.

2. Giving a cheerful greeting to those you meet.

3. Remember that the words you use do make a difference, and also the way you say them.

And remember, we are all healers, sometimes.

This piece expresses the views solely of the author. It does not represent the views of any organization, including Johns Hopkins Medicine.