What’s one life lesson you learned from a patient?

Randy Barker, MD, Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine

Recognizing that I am not just working with one patient – that the immediate members of a patient’s household/world are often very much part of the process of the patient’s illness: e.g.  playing a role in the inception or response to the illness or living the experience bearing the suffering brought on by the patient’s illness.

One of the most memorable examples:

A husband and wife in their late fifties were both my patients. In individual appointments, each voiced a lot of hard to make sense of anger. One day I thought why not have an appointment with both present (to which they both agreed). Within a short period of time both almost simultaneously began to weep profuse tears and poured out the issue that had plagued their days for decades: inability to conceive  a baby….then alcohol-related anger…

This was a pretty extreme example of the value of having all under the roof present.

Kim Stokes, PA-C East Carolina University Physician Assistant Program

Check your baggage at the door. The patient needs your full attention.

Margaret Chisolm, MD, Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine

Anyone is capable of change – there is always hope!

J. John

It is the greatest gift to be invited into someone’s story.

Jill Murphy, Physical Therapist

Early in my career, when my patient revealed her very fresh cancer diagnosis at the beginning of her physical therapy appointment with me, I learned the value of being an empathetic human by listening to her and giving her Kleenex and a hug, instead of being the stoic “professional” that I was taught to be.

William Greenough, MD, Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine

I have a lovely 68-year-old patient from Jamaica who can only blink her eyes and move her eyeballs for the last 11 years who is one of the most positive individuals I know. She can smile and everyone who cares for her is inspired by her – especially me.

Susan Lehman, MD, Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine

An elderly patient of mine gave me a small plaque with her favorite saying:

Hope makes all things possible.

She had struggled with many health and personal challenges during her life but truly embodied a resilient spirit that I very much admired.

I display this plaque in my office and it has been a source of inspiration to me and to others.

Rachel Salas, MD, Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine

When I was a resident, one of my patients had frontotemporal dementia with primary progressive aphasia and was rapidly declining. He had recently begun taking photos as a means to express himself. After his passing, his wife gave me one of his photos that sits in my office still today.

Unbeknownst to him, he taught me many life lessons. One of those was that people always want to express themselves and communicate with others one way or another. Despite his circumstances and all that he went through, he still saw the beauty in things. Today, he continues to communicate with me through this photo.

Diana Anderson, MD, Harvard Medical School

My younger and only sister, who was a patient for many years before she lost her battle 14 months ago, inspired me to keep moving forward in the midst of grief. Medicine doesn’t teach the experience of grief or bereavement. But many of our patients carry loss with them.

We are all in this human experience together. Grief is part of it, and talking about the feelings and our loved ones lost helps.

Colleen Christmas, MD, Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine

I used to care for a quite elderly woman with severe dementia. She was bedbound (I cared for her in her home) and hadn’t been able to speak meaningfully for many years. Her daughter carefully pureed her favorite foods, and hired people to come give her massages and pedicures, and every time I talked to her about her mother’s impending death she sobbed at the thought of losing her. I was always so impressed with the many ways her daughter was able to find to show love to her, and reminded that losing a parent really deeply hurts, no matter how fast or slow the process.

Jessica Colburn, MD, Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine

“Every day, you get to choose whether you will be a person who brings joy into the world.” ~ Mrs J., sharing with me how she made it through some very hard times. I’ve learned so much from my patients about hope and resilience.

Shannon Scott-Vernaglia, MD, MassGeneral

One fun moment reminded me to always be curious, especially with kids. My eight-year-old patient had no questions at WCC.

Me: Not even one question?

Patient: OK, just one, how old are you?

Patient’s mother gasps.

Me: I’ll answer, but first tell me why you ask.

Patient: Because every year you never look any older.

Elizabeth Gundersen, MD

At a bereavement group, a man said he still put on his wife’s robe every morning, a year after her death. Then another person said, “me too,” and then another. Seeing their deep, lasting grief taught me that the way we treat not just dying patients but also their families matters.